It is time we stopped marching to the beat of the European Union’s drum. We must march to the beat of our own drum (drum not provided; please bring your own). You can join our histrionic march at any point along the route. But remember to bring along these essentials:
- A warm hat
- Warm gloves (two minimum)
- A message written on a placard, bearing one of the following officially mandated slogans: "Brexit now!", "Brexit means Brexit!", "Leave means Leave!", "Brexit means Leave!", "Leave means Brexit!", "Now means Now!"
- A compass
- A packet of water purifying tablets
- £50 (in the form of a single used banknote)
How to become a core marcher
What is the point of marching?
Since prehistoric times, historical marches have been the tried and tested way to enact political and cultural change. Relying on public investment, expertise, or any kind of legal democratic process cannot hold a tiki torch to marching. Moving from one location to another over the course of one or more days, while brandishing signs bearing thought-terminating clichés, is the best way to get attention.
“These boots were made for walking”
“These boots were made for licking”
— Nancy Sinatra
The March To Brexit is destined to take its rightful place among other famous historical (and prehistorical) marches; marches like:
- The Women's March
- The Peasants' Revolt (which included some marching)
- The Jarrow March (Leftist, but we'll ignore that)
- March Madness (technically basketball, not marching)
- March For Our Lives
Will you join us? Will you March to Leave (London)? Or will you stay at home, non-marching, in a chair, like some sort of weakling?