Sunderland — Hartlepool
Our journey starts in the historic market town of Sunderland. We shall meet outside the Nissan offices on Washington Road at 7am sharp.
Hartlepool — Middlesbrough
On the second day, we'll be setting out from Hartlepool, famous for the television show Skint Britain. We'll meet at the EDF Power Station at 11.37am sharp.
Middlesbrough — Swainby
In the birthplace of Captain James Cook, the famous explorer who discovered the uninhabited island of Australia (which grew into a country with an enviable record of immigration control). We will meet outside PoundLand in Captain Cook Square at 8.55am.
Aldfield — Wetherby
On the 19th, we’ll set off from Britain’s bar billiards capital, Aldfield. All you studs get yourselves to Studley Park at 8.40am sharp!
Wetherby — Pontefract
On 20th March, the birthday of Dame Vera Lynne, we shall meet at Wetherby War Memorial. After a short speech by Nigel about all that we plucky Brits have done for an ungrateful Europe, we commence marching at 10.10am sharp.
Nostell — Doncaster
Nostell is the most populous small village in England. We meet at 9.45am sharp outside Nostell’s famous Priory.
Wadworth — Worksop
We meet at 6.45am sharp outside Saint John The Baptist’s church to march. Brexit is a kind of Baptism Of Fire: not for the faint-hearted.
Mansfield — Beeston
Beeston — Cropston
In Beeston’s recent history, four newly constructed prefab homes were demolished due to lack of structural integrity. Residents no doubt felt cheated that they were sold a lie. We meet at Mecca Bingo at 10.32am sharp. Note that despite the worrying name, Mecca Bingo is not a mosque.
Leicester — Oakham
Leicester (pronounced “Lie Chester” by our American overlords) is our next starting point. We’ll meet at the National Space Centre — fitting since the Brexit Dividend will be invested in colonizing Jupiter. To infinity and behind!. Join us at 7.50am sharp.
Corby — Wellingborough
Towcester – Padbury
Towcester is the birthplace of professional footballer Elliot Parish. Keep kicking those foot balls, Elliot! We meet at Towcester Centre For Leisure: Towcester’s premier leisure centre.
Aylesbury – Beaconsfield
"Brexit might be a disaster, but I couldn’t give an Aylesbury!" We have fun. This time, the meeting place is at Roald Dahl Children’s Gallery. Roald Dahl, a great British writer, authored The Twits. We meet at 11am sharp.
Preston — Parliament Square
The final stretch! Preston is famous for being the birthplace of Preston from The Ordinary Boys. We meet at Kenton Hall and march to London for what will no doubt be a heroes’ welcome, despite London voting to Remain 60% to 40%. A lot has changed since the vote, and it’s now clearer than ever (if in an abstract, conjectural way) that Brexit will be an even greater success than we had hoped!